Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Battling Myself :(

I don't know why or even where to begin to get me out of this funk that i am in. I hate that all i want to do right now is hide out from the world and pretend that I'm just invisible.

I mean i shouldn't be in this mood. I have everything falling into place and tons of exciting stuff coming up yet all i wanna do is lay in bed curled up under my blankets and watch sad movies so i have an excuse to be crying if someone happens to walk in to my "dark hole" and see what I'm up to.

Really i should be excited and getting things ready for my weekend run away to payson. My Nana and Pawpaw have a cabin up there. You don't get cell phone service but that is totally fine by me i think i needa break and reality break ha ha...Isn't that a horrible thing to want? I mean then i already got the call back on my big referral that it's been approved and i can start the process let I'm scared to death and excited at the same time. Don't get me wrong this big referral is EXACTLY what i want to do it's just a big step and a scary one at the same time.

Also, I just wanna through this is can guy NOT make up their minds, or realize when they have someone who would give them the world given the chance? I mean seriously i could just smack some guys who don't know how to use their brains or whatever their problem is lol!

With all this blahhness being said i think that i will call it a night and prop my foot up curl up in bed watch a movie and try to get some sleep!! Thank you for listening to me rant.